Jon May  

Age: 31 to 40
Occupation: Television Programming
Number of Cruises: 6 to 10 Cruises
Ship: Fascination
Sailing Date: May 27th, 2000
Itinerary: Southern Caribbean

We are in our 30’s.  This was my 7th cruise, my wife’s 5th and our first with Carnival.  We traveled with two other couples.  It was the second cruise for them, their first with Carnival.

We definitely enjoyed our cruise and had a good time.  But, although it was fun, I can’t say this cruise was my favorite.  Some things Carnival did very well.  Other things improvement.  I’ll try to be even-handed with both.  (Hang on, it’s a LONG report…)

We flew into San Juan a day early and I’m glad we did.  Didn’t have to rush around and worry about late flights, etc.  We stayed at the Radisson Normandie, which was very nice, though the continental breakfast was pricey.   Nice décor and clean, large, comfortable rooms.  It’s a 50 cent, 10 minute bus ride from the hotel to Old San Juan.  Took the 50 cent ferry ride to Catano and then a $2.00 taxi to the Bacardi Rum Plant.  Free tour, PLUS they give you free drinks!   Round trip from hotel to Bacardi and back:  $14.00 per couple, including tip. Good time.

The Regatta 2000 (Tall Ships) was in Old San Juan, so the FASCINATION couldn’t dock in its normal place.  Instead it docked about a half-mile East, but much nearer to our hotel.  Unfortunately, the terminal they used wasn’t air-conditioned like the regular one, and the sun was hot!  Stood in line for about 45 minutes, and the line kept moving, but my wife hadn’t eaten much that day and began to feel faint.  A Carnival employee saw her distress and immediately pulled us out of line and into the building.  They sat her down, got her some water and turned a fan towards her to cool her off.  They processed our paperwork and checked us in while we waited for her to feel better.  When she was ready to walk, they escorted us past the line, onto the ship and right to our cabin!  This was a wonderful example of great customer service and I’ve already written Carnival a letter, thanking them.

THE SHIP :   The FASCINATION is a nice, clean ship, but it is large.  It’s the largest ship we’ve ever sailed on, though not even close to the largest afloat.  Personally, I prefer the ‘smaller’ ships (only about 700 feet or so!), but as I said, the ship was nice.  The décor that everyone describes as ‘gaudy’ and ‘Vegas-like’ is actually pretty attractive.  Nice combination of brass, metal and neon, which makes it look, in some areas, like an upscale hotel.  However, one thing about the décor was BAD:  The ‘Hollywood Mannequins’ HAVE TO GO!!  The ship has a Hollywood theme and that’s fine, but these mannequins are spaced throughout the ship, in the middle of public areas.  Not only are they in your way, but they are the most God-awful things I’ve ever seen!  They’re supposed to look like famous movie stars, but they look like nothing except department store mannequins in bad wigs!  GET RID OF THEM!

Open deck space wasn’t a problem.  If you want to hang out on deck, but don’t want the packed crowds of the central pool deck, there’s a large pool deck aft, behind the smokestack, that’s far less crowded.  It’s more laid back and we never had a problem getting a chair, even on our ‘extra’ day at sea  (which I’ll get to later).

The pedestrian ‘flow’ of the ship was a problem, however.  In my opinion, based on other ships I’ve been on, I think this ship was poorly designed in spots.  There is no ‘walk-around’ deck that you can walk outside all the way around the ship.  This is the first ship I’ve seen that hasn’t had such a thing.  In fact, except for the pool deck, there wasn’t much outside space at all.  Guess that’s a trend in cruise ships.  Ashame.  What’s the point of a Caribbean cruise if you can’t (or don’t want to) go outside?  The interior of the ship had some good points.  The 7-story Grand Spectrum is cool, the casino is pretty large, the dining rooms are plenty big.  But, the flow was still a problem. On only one deck could you walk from aft to forward without taking extra stairs.  There was a lot of ‘You can’t get there from here’.  You had to go up, over and down quite a bit to get where you’re going.  Not a huge problem, but often inconvenient.  In addition, in a few areas on ‘Hollywood Blvd.’, the main pedestrian walkways were so narrow  that it was often clogged and hard to get through.  The Palace Lounge had comfy seats, but they were too close together and it was hard to see from almost everywhere.

Our cabin was great!  Really liked it.  Nice and roomy for two people (though it would have been crowded with more).  Jorge, our Cabin Steward, did a super job, and made the towel animals that everyone raves about.  He was always in and out of the cabin very quickly and we hardly ever saw him.  My wife was a little annoyed that he did ‘unauthorized straightening’ of her stuff on the desk, causing her to rearrange things the way she wanted it.  But, if we had asked him not to, I know he would have complied.  We left him a note asking for an extra blanket, and got one that night.  Always had ice.  No complaints about the cabin!

We got late seating dinner (which we asked for), BUT we almost didn’t.  We requested it when we booked 5 months prior, and Carnival confirmed it to our travel agent.  Then about 2 weeks prior, they called him and said we’d been moved to Early Seating.  They were ‘trying to accommodate’ one of several larger groups that had since booked the trip (an omen of things to come…)  My travel agent raised a ruckus, and they switched us back to Late Seating.  So, check with your agent to confirm your preference before you leave!  Never assume!

Dining Room service was excellent. George (Romania) was our waiter and Nuriata (Indonesia) was our Asst. Waiter.  Both were very attentive and a lot of fun.  They did ‘tricks’ for us and chatted with us whenever they had a minute.  Our bar waitress, Elda, also from Romania, was sweet and friendly, but sometimes a little late in arriving.  (Oh, well.  It’s not like we didn’t have enough to drink!)  The food in the dining room was very good.  I’ve had better, but certainly we had no complaints and no problem with special orders.  The waiters paraded and danced almost every night, which was fun!  We ate upstairs in the Coconut Grove café for  lunches and all but one breakfast.  The food there was ‘good enough’.  A few dishes were really good, and they had a good salad bar, but most of it was just okay.  What the heck, we were ‘on the run’ for those meals anyway.  The pizza they served was pretty good.  Not as good as home, but still tasty.  The pizzeria is NOT open 24 hours, despite what they say.  It’s open most times, but there were several times we saw it closed.  In fact, be aware of meal times in general.  If you have late seating (as we did) and want a snack to tide you over, you better get it before 3:30 or 4.  After that they shut everything down and you have to order room service (which is good) to get a snack.  Well, at least the bars were open!

Speaking of bars, the service was excellent and the prices very reasonable for a cruise ship.  A Corona cost the same on the ship as it would at Applebee’s back home.  Same with soda prices.  Most mixed drinks ranged from $3.00-$4.50, and even the specials with souvenir glasses were $5.75.  Seems like a lot, but it WAS cheaper than many other ships.  One of the bar waiters in the pool area knew my name by the third day!  You can buy a bucket of beers filled with ice to keep them cold!  Nice touch. 

  THE CLIENTELE (aka the other passengers):  Sadly, this was a big negative.  It was Memorial Day weekend, but most schools weren’t finished yet, so we had hoped for few kids.  WRONG!!!  The ship was swarming with teenagers and children!  More than I’ve ever seen on any cruise!  The teens took over almost every room and activity and were often very rude.  Apparently, most of their ‘parents’ don’t bother with such inconveniences as teaching basic politeness.  There were (and I’m always amazed when I see this) many parents with small children and even INFANTS!  Will someone please explain to me why people bring young children on a cruise ship?  They’re too young to appreciate it (or even remember it) and you have to constantly watch them anyway (though THAT was apparently inconvenient for many ‘parents’, too).  HOW can you have any fun yourself?  Personally, we love kids, but LEAVE ‘EM  AT HOME OR DON’T CRUISE!  PERIOD.  I wish the major cruise lines would offer an adults-only cruise. Cruising should be an ADULT vacation!  (Okay, end of rant.)

There were two large groups onboard.  One was a HUGE number of people from Puerto Rico.  I know that’s to be expected since we sail from San Juan, but our NCL cruise in ’96 out of San Juan didn’t have nearly as many.  It was a much more evenly mixed and diverse crowd, nationality-wise.  It wasn’t a problem when we were IN Puerto Rico itself.  Everyone was wonderfully friendly.   But, maybe these particular people felt they had priority or something, once they got on the ship.  I don’t know.  I know how it sounds, but sorry to say, we eventually got sick of hearing Spanish and were grateful when anyone spoke English to us.  It was mostly (but not exclusively) teenagers that were the problem.  The other large group was a bunch of women from Tupperware.  Apparently, there was some kind of reward trip or convention or something.  This is okay in theory, except that, at least once a day (sometimes more) they closed off a lounge or other large area for a ‘Private Party’ for these people.  Now, we’ve seen this before, but it got really excessive and restricted our access to areas we would have liked to use.  One evening, they even closed off the aft pool deck for their little party, which was our favorite romantic place for watching the stars.  I realize Carnival must cater to groups to a degree, but we paid just as much (if not more) for our cruise and it became really annoying to be denied access to public areas so they could all celebrate their cheap, plastic dishes!  I know others on the ship felt the same way.  We sometimes felt like second class passengers.  Obviously, there were some very nice people, and we enjoyed meeting and talking with many of our fellow passengers.  But, the bottom line is:  Carnival does seem to attract a ‘less refined’ crowd of people than other lines.  We’re in our 30’s and love to party and have a good time (which we did).  But, somehow the clientele just wasn’t as ‘classy’ as other cruises we’ve been on.  Sorry, but that’s my opinion.

Cruise staff was, overall, the worst we’ve seen on any ship.  The ‘Cruise Director’ (Marahschalh Stanton) was really nothing more than a glorified M.C. and shopping consultant.  All his ‘port talks’ discussed nothing but the recommended stores and shopping.  Very little information about the islands themselves, except as it related to shopping.  There are always ‘recommended stores’ on any cruise line, but I have NEVER seen a cruise line push them more than Carnival.  In fact, they flat out discouraged you from roaming around and shopping on your own (which I’ve never seen).  He made Dominica sound downright dangerous (which it’s not) and made a big point of saying there was only ONE recommended store in Dominica and in Martinique.  (It was a Colombian Emeralds store and there’s one of these stores in EVERY port I have EVER been to!)  And if the shopping is so bad and things are so ‘dangerous’, then why does the ship go there?  You never saw him except during his shopping….er....port talks or when he introduced the shows (which were bad).  There were only two other guys on the cruise staff.  They did the pool games, bingo, etc. (The activities themselves were fine.)   One of the guys never talked and the other one talked LOUDLY.  Not really his fault, but the sound system on the pool deck was CRANKED!  We go to rock concerts with less volume!  You couldn’t hear yourself think or have a conversation.  Really annoying.  On our other cruises, there were at least 6 or 7 cruise staff members who were always running around participating in everything!  Shopping was obviously their focus on Carnival.

PURSER’S OFFICE:   Staff was courteous, professional, informative and quick.   No complaints.

LIFEBOAT DRILL:   The worst I’ve ever endured.  I don’t usually mind it, because I know it’s necessary, but it was VERY disorganized and chaotic.  Never called out cabin numbers or did a roll call of any kind. When we walked up to our Muster Station, everyone was so crushed together it was impossible to move.  THEN, they wanted us to move forward to let more people in.  There was nowhere to go, but they kept shouting at us to move up!  It took about 50 minutes, when it usually takes 15 or 20.  We jokingly decided that if the ship goes down, we’ll just drown!  Fortunately, we didn’t need the lifeboats.

PORTS & EXCURSIONS:   We only booked one Carnival Shore Excursion the whole week.  In general, you can save from a little to a LOT of money by doing things yourself, if you do some research ahead of time.

ST. THOMAS.   Beautiful weather!  Yay! This was probably my favorite day of the cruise.  We skipped downtown, since we’d been there before.  Instead, we went to ST. JOHN on our own.   Took a taxi to Red Hook, then the Ferry to Cruz Bay (cheaper and quicker than the Ferry from downtown).  Another taxi to Trunk Bay. The beach was gorgeous! The snorkel trail was fun.  Next time, we’ll investigate other beaches nearby, which also looked nice.  If you go to Trunk Bay and want to snorkel, DON’T rent snorkel equipment from the ship.  They only charge you $4.00 at Trunk, versus a minimum of $10.00 on the ship.  (Bring a credit card for the refundable deposit, though.)  There are rest rooms, showers, a snack bar and a gift shop, yet it all seems so quiet and peaceful.  Get there early in the day to avoid crowds, but it was never packed.  Loved seeing the mongooses running around.  Look sharp!  Went back to Cruz Bay and shopped a little, then went to Pusser’s for ‘Pain Killers’.  An absolute must!  Returned to cruise pier and shopped at Havensight Mall, right next to the ship.  Most of the same shops as downtown, except Havensight is open later on a Sunday (Downtown shops close by 1PM). Bought a few things, had more drinks (cheap liquor!) and got back on the ship.  Gulls followed us out about a mile as we left the island.

ST. MAARTEN:   My LEAST favorite day of the cruise.  Choppy seas were too much for the tender boats, so the Captain cancelled the port!  I had a scuba dive planned there that I had arranged via internet.  PLUS, I had also arranged to surprise my wife with renewing our wedding vows on a beach at Oyster Bay.  SURPRISE!  Wanted desperately to blame someone, but we really couldn’t.  Stuff happens.  It was cloudy that day, though the sun occasionally peeked through.  We went up on deck after breakfast and killed a 12-pack of Heineken before Noon!  Drowned our sorrows and got a little pseudo-sun, at least.  I had said I thought 5 ports was a lot.  Guess God heard me!  Carnival gave everyone a $20.00 credit on their account, but I found out from the Purser, this was really just a refund of the port charge.  Thought they should have given us a little something extra, especially since they made more money that day (drinks, etc.) than they would have otherwise.

DOMINICA:      Another semi-cloudy day.  Looked threatening at first, but never rained on us.  It’s called the ‘Nature Island’ and it lives up to the name.  We had arranged (via e-mail) a tour for all 6 of us to the Emerald Pool and Trafalgar Falls with Ken’s Hinterland Adventure Tours.  HIGHLY recommend this company.  They were about half the price of the ship’s tours to the same places (for 4 or more people, it’s $25.00 per person vs. almost $50 each through the ship).  He didn’t require a deposit ahead of time, and told me he’d meet us on the pier when arrived.  There was no confirmation other than e-mail, so I was a little leery, but he was right there when we got off the ship!  He introduced us to Roger, our guide, and we set off for the Emerald Pool.  The roads are VERY narrow and windy, but the scenery is beautiful!  Word of warning:  If you go to these two attractions, try to get there as early as possible.  They get VERY crowded when the ship tours show up!  Swam in the Emerald Pool, which was neat.  Bought some native crafts and tried some raw coconut.  Chewy, but good!  Trafalgar was next.  Larger and even more crowded, but beautiful.  Walked to the viewing platform.  Roger was willing to take us further down to where you can swim at the base of the Falls, but I was the only one who wanted to, so we didn’t.  Next time, for sure.  Tried the local beer, ‘Kubuli’ and it was really good!  Roger took the ‘scenic route’ back to the pier.  The trip took about 3-1/2 hours.  More driving than I would have liked, but you simply have to drive to get to these places AND we got to see a decent portion of the island.  Went to the craft market across the street from the pier and bought some more stuff.  Lunch at a little café.  Sat with the locals.  Tried a ‘roti’, which is like a big Caribbean burrito with chicken and potatoes.  REALLY GOOD!  Another Kubuli for me, a hot dog and coke for my wife.  Total cost:  $9.00, including a $2.00 tip.  Stuff is really cheap in Dominica, but there’s some great island craft stuff.  Baskets, pottery, soaps, woodcrafts, etc.  Most expensive thing we bought there was $10.   Would love to come back sometime.  Plenty to do and my wife lamented that she wished she’d bought more stuff there.

MARTINIQUE:  I was in a bad mood that morning and had heard such negative things about the port that I was apprehensive about getting off the ship.  But, my wife insisted and I’m glad she did.  It’s a 20 minute walk to the downtown area, no taxi needed.  There’s a large market area, in addition to the regular stores.  Contrary to what I’d heard, no one was rude to us at all and everyone we met spoke enough English that we had no trouble communicating.  Again, goods were pretty cheap.  Tried more local beers here ($1.50 each!).  ‘Corsaire’ and ‘Biere Lorraine’.  Both really good.  It was cloudy, but didn’t rain and we had a nice walk around the Fort-de-France area.  It’s not the most attractive port in the world, but still not the ‘ghetto’ that others have described.  We booked the Calypso Party Cruise through the ship (the only ship tour we took).  Had a great time.  They had an electrical problem, so we had no music for the first half of the trip, but that wasn’t a big deal for us as long as the rum punch was flowing.  (BOY, was it flowing!)  They took us to the mouth of a bat cave, and we could see them flying around.  Cool!  Went past several beaches and then stopped at one for about an hour.  The water wasn’t as clear as other islands, but it was warm and the beach was nice.  Another local beer, ‘Carib’.  Yum.  Beaches in Martinique are topless, so we saw a few ‘sights’, but no big deal.  They fixed the sound system, so we had music on the way back.  Fun time!  And at $35.00 per person, one of the cheaper tours Carnival offered.  All in all, I’m glad we went to Martinique and the day really perked me up!

BARBADOS:   This was our final port and the sun finally came out clear and bright!  We went into downtown Bridgetown to shop.  Of all the ports, the taxi hawkers were the pushiest here.  They weren’t rude, mind you, and they did take ‘no’ for an answer, but boy, did they push!  You really don’t need a taxi for a walk into town, but that didn’t stop them.  They asked us on the way into town, they asked us on the street in town.  They asked us IN THE SHOPS!  Eventually, we just had to ignore them and keep walking.  Bought a few things, but wasn’t impressed with the downtown area at all.  Neither was my wife.  On the way back to the ship we stopped at Pelican Village, which was a little plaza of small craft/art shops.  Nice and laid back.  No pressure.  Stopped at a little café and continued the ‘Beers of the Caribbean Tour’ with Banks, the beer of Barbados!  Another good one!  Shops at the cruise terminal are nice and clean.  Bought some GREAT hot sauce!  Met up with our friends and took a taxi tour to the Barbados Wildlife Reserve.  $50.00 round trip for 4 people. Barbados is more expensive than any other island that week.  The reserve is about a 30-40 minute drive from the pier, but it’s a nice, scenic route.  I thought it would be bigger and more ‘rain-forest’ like, but it was still very attractive, very well-kept and there were LOTS of animals to see!  No cages, they just wander around, including the famous Green Monkeys, which run all around you.  Fun time!  Strange, but the cruise line never mentioned this place and no island tour operators go there, yet it’s a great attraction.  Stopped at Chattel Village shops to do more shopping.  Passed Mullins Beach (and others) which supposedly is one of the best, but it was crowded and narrow and right next to the road.  Next time, we’ll check out the beaches on the East (Atlantic) side of the island.  We stayed in Barbados till 10pm, but I honestly don’t know why.  It was definitely nice, but not much nightlife that I know of.  It was nice, though, to not have to rush back to the ship.  The Jolly Roger people were absent from dinner (as I heard they would be), but a HUGE number of people were missing from the dining room.  George and Nuriata hung out with us most of the evening, since they didn’t have many other tables that night.

FINAL DAY AT SEA:   Bright hot sun!  A great way to end the cruise!  Laid on the pool deck till about 3:30pm, baking and drinking.  FUN!  Later that evening, played Black Jack in the casino for the first time and came away $17.00 ahead.  Good time.

DEBARKATION:   The Regatta was gone so we docked in the normal place.  Had an ‘early’ flight (12:15), so we met in the lounge at 8:30am.  They made announcements over the PA, but didn’t pipe it into the lounge, so we couldn’t hear them.  Fortunately, someone came and got us when it was time.  We got off and found our luggage.  Our friends were missing one bag, which took them about 25 minutes to find.  Turns out, it was in a whole different section.  So much for colored tags.  The terminal was air-conditioned, but was narrow and crowded with not much room to move around.  We got outside and discovered we’d made a tactical error.  You can go to the purser’s office starting at 6AM and check in for your flights.  They give you your airline luggage tags right then.  We should have done that.  Since we didn’t, we had to wait in the airline check-in line on the pier before our luggage could be loaded on the truck.  There were only 7 or 8 people in front of me, but I was in that line for more than 30 minutes!  At least we didn’t have to rush to make the flight.  Finally, we got on the bus and headed to the airport, for an uneventful flight home.

All in all, despite the little annoyances, we enjoyed our vacation and the cruise.    Of the 4 ports we visited, there were none that I disliked and I would like to visit all of them again in the future.  Important to note that had this been our FIRST cruise, many of the problems might not have seemed as annoying, but we are forced to compare it with our other trips.  Would we sail with Carnival again?  Perhaps, if there was a really great deal, but it won’t be our first choice.  Everyone has their favorites, but I think ours is NCL.  Carnival does many things well, but also does some things not so well.  I guess that’s true of any cruise line, but that was our experience with Carnival.  Please feel free to e-mail us for more information.  Happy Cruising!

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